Emotionally you're going through a time of developing your identity, getting confident with the changes that are going on within you, and then making a success of this person that you've become. Nobody said it would be easy, but here are some tips so you understand the changes that might just make it easier?

It seems to be a time of a lot of questions - "Who am I?", "What do I Want to Become?", "How will I Do That?", "Is there a God or Higher Power?", "Why am I Here?"?

While others may have guided you when you were a child, it is now time to re-examine your belief and value system.  These are the guiding systems for the important decisions in your life. Remember to hold onto the beliefs and values that are good for you and will serve you in the long run. Those that are doing you no good shouldn't be retained in that form. Your parents and peers can help you with information and support at this time. But the final decisions are yours to make as you become more and more independent.

Self-confidence and self-esteem are all about how your feel about yourself, and your own general feeling of self-worth. Sometimes it helps if you grew up in a household that supported you as a worthy individual. But now you'll tend to measure your self-esteem based on what other peers think about you.

Often celebrities, movie stars and the media in general can affect how you feel about your appearance or the value of the things you do. Remember that you are unique and there is no one who can do exactly what you can do. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses (including the paid actors and actresses on screen).  The key is balance. What that means is that you are more than your looks - all the things that make you the interesting individual, make you who you are.

You can help create balance in your life by getting involved in different activities, groups of people, trying out new things that might just be what you're looking for as a new strength! Finding things you're good at help support your self-esteem - as you experience success after success, your confidence will increase.

Sometimes people have a very narrow definition of success, talent, and ways of connecting them. But as you grow up you'll find there are various types of intelligence. Howard Gardner, a psychologist, revealed that there are broadly seven basic types of intelligence and abilities:

• Verbal and written expression
• Logic and problem-solving
• Mental picture formulation (creating works of art)
• Music composition talents
• Motor Movements (dancing or athletic activities)
• Interpersonal skills (understanding people and their feelings)
• Personal self-awareness (understanding oneself)

So what does it mean to you? Your skills might be different from your friends and peers. That's all right. As a student, besides just getting good grades in all subjects or just being good at a sport, there are other indicators of success:

• Can you make school life enjoyable and meaningful? Is learning fun? 
• Are you learning how to learn?
• Do you know what your interests and abilities are and have you found ways of improving them? These could be mental, technical, vocational, musical, or artistic pursuits.
• Have you acquired social skills - understanding others and yourself better and gaining a sense of belonging?

If you are already working, there's more to success in life than just doing your job:

• Is your work enjoyable to you - meaningful, satisfying, and challenging?
• Is your contribution in the workplace valued?
• Have you found your strengths and competencies on the job? Managing all your tasks and growing in knowledge and experience in your field?
• Have you honed your interpersonal skills and ethical standards?
• Are you in a constant state of developing yourself and others? Are you student, teacher, leader and team player?

Setting goals helps you reach them more easily and reduces misplaced energy which results in stress. Just remember some SMART tips for setting your goals:

• Specific: Making goals specific helps you understand what you intend on achieving.
• Measurable: Knowing when you have achieved your goals, making them measurable, helps you to chart your progress and success.
• Achievable: People who set reasonable and realistic goals know that they can achieve them and have a greater tendency to do so.
• Responsible: The goal must truly be desired and you have to take responsibility for it.
• Time frame: Setting a time frame by which it must be accomplished helps you to guide your accomplishments.

"The secret of success is constancy in purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli